Saturday, May 14, 2011
It's been a while
Life has been insanely busy and I have totally forgotten about my blog. Work, school, soccer, baseball and life! Will update when I get a free moment and that is not right now!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
My birthday
My first birthday without hearing my dads voice is almost over. It has been a good day but I have had a heavy heart. I miss him so very much and I just keep wishing I could hear his voice one more time...
I spent most of the day outside in my garden, I planted some sweet peas and some sugar snap peas. I got all of my seeds in pots and in my front porch so they should be ready for the garden in May. Being outside made me feel better, my dad loved to be outside and I felt him with me. He never got a chance to see our garden after we took down our big patio fence...it was his idea. I guess he can see it from where he is now...at least I hope he can.
Well happy first day of spring everyone :) Hoping for sunny days soon.
I spent most of the day outside in my garden, I planted some sweet peas and some sugar snap peas. I got all of my seeds in pots and in my front porch so they should be ready for the garden in May. Being outside made me feel better, my dad loved to be outside and I felt him with me. He never got a chance to see our garden after we took down our big patio fence...it was his idea. I guess he can see it from where he is now...at least I hope he can.
Well happy first day of spring everyone :) Hoping for sunny days soon.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
March 19th 2008
This was the day my dad told me he had lung cancer. I will never forget that day as it was the day before my birthday. My dad was in a terrible dilemma, he had just found out about his diagnosis and it was the day before my birthday. What should he do? How could he possibly wait until after my birthday to tell us...yet he knew telling me that day would likely make my birthday less enjoyable. I am glad he made the decision to tell me that day and he did not try to pretend all was well until after my birthday. This is my first birthday without my dad, I miss him so much. Last year he was so sick but he wanted to buy me a special gift. He had hoped to go shopping with me at his favorite little store in the town he lived but he could hardly get out of bed. So he told me to go and pick something...I bought a beautiful birdhouse. He gave me a card and told me how was lucky to have a daughter like me. The card makes me cry because his writing was so shaky...
I miss you Dad <3
I miss you Dad <3
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Signs from above...
I have always believed that when people leave this earth they send signs to their loved ones still here. I take notice of those signs and find great comfort in them. I know some people so not believe them and that is ok, I believe them and that is what matters to me.
My oldest child has had a few issues with being a minor in possession of alcohol(MIP). Just before his 21st birthday in Oct of last year he received his third MIP which violated his probation from a previous MIP. So in February he had to serve five days in jail in Ellensburg WA, which is a 3 hour drive from my house. I drove him there on a Friday and waited with him until they took him to book in. Then I walked out to my van and I cried. All the worst thoughts went through my head, a mother does not want to take their child to jail. As I drove away tears continued to fall...I looked ahead and I noticed two rainbows. They were big and bright and beautiful and I suddenly felt as though things would be ok. I picked my son up after he had served his time and brought him home. We got home and me and him and his brothers were sitting on the couch talking about his jail time. I looked out my living room window and there were two beautiful bright rainbows...and I knew...I absolutely knew it was a sign from above.
My oldest child has had a few issues with being a minor in possession of alcohol(MIP). Just before his 21st birthday in Oct of last year he received his third MIP which violated his probation from a previous MIP. So in February he had to serve five days in jail in Ellensburg WA, which is a 3 hour drive from my house. I drove him there on a Friday and waited with him until they took him to book in. Then I walked out to my van and I cried. All the worst thoughts went through my head, a mother does not want to take their child to jail. As I drove away tears continued to fall...I looked ahead and I noticed two rainbows. They were big and bright and beautiful and I suddenly felt as though things would be ok. I picked my son up after he had served his time and brought him home. We got home and me and him and his brothers were sitting on the couch talking about his jail time. I looked out my living room window and there were two beautiful bright rainbows...and I knew...I absolutely knew it was a sign from above.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
First game of the season
First of all let me just say that yesterday was one long day! I left the house at 6:30am to run to the store to pick up a few things for our soccer concession stand and I was on the go until 10pm....but it was sooo worth it!!
Blake's team played at 5pm, now Blake played soccer for the first time ever this past fall on a rec team. Last night he played his first Junior Varsity team and they started him in goal! Oh my!!! Blake has never played keeper before so we are all a bit nervous...ok a lot nervous! Being the parent of a goal keep is very stressful and I am not sure I could handle it for a full season! Blake did so well, he let in one goal in the first half and in the second half someone else was keeper. They ended up losing 3-2 but it was a pretty good game.
Kyle (Varsity) played at 7pm. This game was SO intense! The teams were pretty evenly matched at one point we were up 1-0, but the other team tied it up. In high school soccer they will not end in a tie, so we played two 5 minute overtime halves. Overtime is golden goal, so first goal wins. There were some very intense moments in the overtime halves but at the end it was still tied 1-1. So after overtime comes the penalty shootout...Let me tell you I can not even count how many times we have gone to penalty shootouts over the years...this is my 7th year with high school soccer and so many games end this way....and I have always had a kid who is one of our shooters. Andy was always one of the teams shooters and now Kyle is. When your kid is shooting it is so stressful! Even Andy who comes out to watch gets totally stressed when Kyle is shooting lol I tell him now you know what I went through all those years when you were doing it! Anyhow back to last nights game...it took eight penalty shots from each team before we won the game! Whew....stresss!!! But oh so exciting, what a way to start the season!
Blake's team played at 5pm, now Blake played soccer for the first time ever this past fall on a rec team. Last night he played his first Junior Varsity team and they started him in goal! Oh my!!! Blake has never played keeper before so we are all a bit nervous...ok a lot nervous! Being the parent of a goal keep is very stressful and I am not sure I could handle it for a full season! Blake did so well, he let in one goal in the first half and in the second half someone else was keeper. They ended up losing 3-2 but it was a pretty good game.
Kyle (Varsity) played at 7pm. This game was SO intense! The teams were pretty evenly matched at one point we were up 1-0, but the other team tied it up. In high school soccer they will not end in a tie, so we played two 5 minute overtime halves. Overtime is golden goal, so first goal wins. There were some very intense moments in the overtime halves but at the end it was still tied 1-1. So after overtime comes the penalty shootout...Let me tell you I can not even count how many times we have gone to penalty shootouts over the years...this is my 7th year with high school soccer and so many games end this way....and I have always had a kid who is one of our shooters. Andy was always one of the teams shooters and now Kyle is. When your kid is shooting it is so stressful! Even Andy who comes out to watch gets totally stressed when Kyle is shooting lol I tell him now you know what I went through all those years when you were doing it! Anyhow back to last nights game...it took eight penalty shots from each team before we won the game! Whew....stresss!!! But oh so exciting, what a way to start the season!
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Whew...life!
Well I have a few minutes so thought I'd just do a quick life update :)
It's March now which means spring is just around the corner! At least I hope it is, we have had some weird weather recently including snow. Anyhow I am hoping to get some seeds started for my garden this weekend. Hoping for some dry weather soon too so I can actually go work in my garden and get it ready for planting.
Around here spring also means my birthday and anniversary, looking forward to those days. But this year spring will also bring some hard times in my life. Josh's birthday is this month, and that is going to be a very difficult day for us. I am trying to think of something special I can do for Blake and Josh's mom on that day. My dad's birthday is coming up too and so is the one year anniversary of his death. Both will be very difficult days. I am planning to be with my sister on the anniversary of his death, we are going to go to the Hospice House where he spent his last days and spend some time in the beautiful garden there.
Ok, enough doom and gloom on to the busy things in my life! Andy and Kyle are both playing on an adult league soccer team right now, their season started last weekend. Kyle is also playing Varsity soccer for high school and Blake is playing Junior Varsity soccer. Their first games are on March 14th! Can't wait :) :) Blake will also be starting baseball soon, looking forward to that too. I am still working my reduced hours...well actually I am working more lol but supposed to be working 27.5 hrs per week. My online classes started on Feb 28th, so am just finishing up my first week. I just got my first assignment feedback and received 100%! I am very pleased about that. I submitted my first assignment for my second class this morning and am hoping for a good grade on it as well.
Well think that's about it for the moment! Enjoy spring everyone :)
Oh! Almost forgot, yesterday I got my hair cut off!! I am donating it to Locks of Love, my new hair is soooo short but its cute and I like it.
It's March now which means spring is just around the corner! At least I hope it is, we have had some weird weather recently including snow. Anyhow I am hoping to get some seeds started for my garden this weekend. Hoping for some dry weather soon too so I can actually go work in my garden and get it ready for planting.
Around here spring also means my birthday and anniversary, looking forward to those days. But this year spring will also bring some hard times in my life. Josh's birthday is this month, and that is going to be a very difficult day for us. I am trying to think of something special I can do for Blake and Josh's mom on that day. My dad's birthday is coming up too and so is the one year anniversary of his death. Both will be very difficult days. I am planning to be with my sister on the anniversary of his death, we are going to go to the Hospice House where he spent his last days and spend some time in the beautiful garden there.
Ok, enough doom and gloom on to the busy things in my life! Andy and Kyle are both playing on an adult league soccer team right now, their season started last weekend. Kyle is also playing Varsity soccer for high school and Blake is playing Junior Varsity soccer. Their first games are on March 14th! Can't wait :) :) Blake will also be starting baseball soon, looking forward to that too. I am still working my reduced hours...well actually I am working more lol but supposed to be working 27.5 hrs per week. My online classes started on Feb 28th, so am just finishing up my first week. I just got my first assignment feedback and received 100%! I am very pleased about that. I submitted my first assignment for my second class this morning and am hoping for a good grade on it as well.
Well think that's about it for the moment! Enjoy spring everyone :)
Oh! Almost forgot, yesterday I got my hair cut off!! I am donating it to Locks of Love, my new hair is soooo short but its cute and I like it.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Teen Mom
When I first heard there was a show on MTV called Teen Mom I thought, oh that's just great glorify being a teen mom! Now how many teenagers will get pregnant just to try and be on an MTV show. I never watched it. The kids would talk about it and I told them I thought it was ridiculous to have a show like that on TV. You see I was a teen mom, I know the struggles...
Well yesterday was a snow day, I went to work for a couple of hours and when I cam home Blake was just leaving with his friends. He had left the TV on, and yep you guessed it...Teen Mom was on. I sat down with the intent of changing the channel, but before I knew it I was sucked in and watching Teen Mom. It was so real, there was no glorification there at all. It showed the struggles of being a teen mom. If i was a young person watching that show it would really make me think twice about being very careful not to become pregnant. I still don't know that it's TV worthy but it's definitely not what I thought it was.
Well yesterday was a snow day, I went to work for a couple of hours and when I cam home Blake was just leaving with his friends. He had left the TV on, and yep you guessed it...Teen Mom was on. I sat down with the intent of changing the channel, but before I knew it I was sucked in and watching Teen Mom. It was so real, there was no glorification there at all. It showed the struggles of being a teen mom. If i was a young person watching that show it would really make me think twice about being very careful not to become pregnant. I still don't know that it's TV worthy but it's definitely not what I thought it was.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Good day
Its been a very good day
My cat who has been at the kitty hospital since Sat got to come home today!!! He has been giving me sooo much love, such a sweet cat. So happy to have him home.
Its been snowing off and on all day. Just now starting to stick but falling snow makes me happy.
5 days until my classes start!
Yep...its a good day :)
My cat who has been at the kitty hospital since Sat got to come home today!!! He has been giving me sooo much love, such a sweet cat. So happy to have him home.
Its been snowing off and on all day. Just now starting to stick but falling snow makes me happy.
5 days until my classes start!
Yep...its a good day :)
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Work, work, work
My husband works SO much sometimes. It isn't because he would rather be at work because I know he would much rather be here. It isn't because he is a workaholic either. He is just a super responsible person and when he needs to work to get things done, well he works to get things done. I am thankful he has a job, and I am so thankful he works so hard, and I really like the extra money on his pay check. But I wish his weekends were spent at home and not at work. Today is an absolutely gorgeous day here in the Pacific Northwest and if he were home we'd go for a hike or do something fun outdoors. Yes, I could do that by myself or go meet up with some friends, but I really want him to be with me. So I guess instead I will spend some time out cleaning up my garden. Maybe I will go for a walk...
Friday, February 18, 2011
Things I never knew...
Funny how after almost 11 years together I am still learning new things about the man I am married to.
He just recently told me he worries terribly when I travel without him...something I do often. I wonder why he never told me that before? Maybe he thought I knew, or maybe he thought my fierce independence would say "Oh stop being silly, I can take care of myself!" or maybe telling me made him feel vulnerable...I don't know. But I must say it made me feel good to know how much he worries. Also made me realize how important it is to let him know when I arrive safely. I usually always do that, but every now and then I forget.
I also learned when he makes a sandwich the cheese has to go with the mustard! lol Ok...so whats the big deal there? Well really nothing, except that my husband is the most normal person I know and I didn't think he had any weird quirks like that lol I have a million of them...so maybe he is not as normal I as I thought lol
He just recently told me he worries terribly when I travel without him...something I do often. I wonder why he never told me that before? Maybe he thought I knew, or maybe he thought my fierce independence would say "Oh stop being silly, I can take care of myself!" or maybe telling me made him feel vulnerable...I don't know. But I must say it made me feel good to know how much he worries. Also made me realize how important it is to let him know when I arrive safely. I usually always do that, but every now and then I forget.
I also learned when he makes a sandwich the cheese has to go with the mustard! lol Ok...so whats the big deal there? Well really nothing, except that my husband is the most normal person I know and I didn't think he had any weird quirks like that lol I have a million of them...so maybe he is not as normal I as I thought lol
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Biggest loser
Today we started a Biggest Loser contest at work! We all weighed in today...that sucked lol I hate anyone knowing my weight, but we all felt the same way so it was ok. We have one person who is not doing the contest that recorded our weights and she is the only one who knows what we weigh. The contest is going to run until May 19th and the winner should end up with $300!! Whoo....I want to win! I will update my progress here just because. Wish me luck!
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability | Video on TED.com
Brene Brown: The power of vulnerability Video on TED.com
Please take the time to watch this. It is so true, a few years ago I was so afraid of being vulnerable that I wouldn't let anyone in. Instead I hid behind anger, because anger would not make me vulnerable. Slowly I allowed myself to feel more hurt, more happiness, more of everything.To most people I always seemed happy and positive, but inside I was and angry depressed mess. I allowed very few people to know that side of me. In fact there were only two(I hope they know who they are) and with their help I became a different person.They might not even realize the impact they have had on my life and my well being. Slowly the anger and depression drifted away to feeling truly happy.Today, I feel I am a truly wholehearted person. I love, I hurt, I grieve, and I do it all with intensity. I allow more people to see that side of me and I've learned that the people that matter love me anyway. I am a much more lovable person these days.
Please take the time to watch this. It is so true, a few years ago I was so afraid of being vulnerable that I wouldn't let anyone in. Instead I hid behind anger, because anger would not make me vulnerable. Slowly I allowed myself to feel more hurt, more happiness, more of everything.To most people I always seemed happy and positive, but inside I was and angry depressed mess. I allowed very few people to know that side of me. In fact there were only two(I hope they know who they are) and with their help I became a different person.They might not even realize the impact they have had on my life and my well being. Slowly the anger and depression drifted away to feeling truly happy.Today, I feel I am a truly wholehearted person. I love, I hurt, I grieve, and I do it all with intensity. I allow more people to see that side of me and I've learned that the people that matter love me anyway. I am a much more lovable person these days.
Friday, February 11, 2011
It just doesnt sound right
I keep starting a blog...but it just won't come out right. So no blog from me today, how about a picture instead.
Clam digging on New Years Day :)
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Living your dreams
Are you living your dreams? If not, why? and do you think you will get there? Have your dreams changed?
I am living the life I used to dream of and never thought I'd have. In my old life I was always hurting, angry, broken...rarely was I truly happy. I felt like I did not belong anywhere. I dreamed of a life where I'd be happy, where I'd have a home that felt like home, where I'd feel like I belonged. Here I am, honestly content with my life. Sure there are still dream for the future, but if my life stayed as it is today I'd be perfectly happy with that. I love my home, and it FEELS like home, I love the area I live in, I feel loved every day by the people around me. It truly doesn't get much better than this. As for my future dreams...
I plan on getting my degree and moving forward on the career path I am on, which is serving the elderly and disabled in my community.
I plan to spend more time hiking, camping, just being outdoors.
One day maybe I will have the farm I dream of where I can raise more of my own food.
I also plan on continuing to feel loved every day by the people around me and loving them in return, because in the end that is what truly matters to me.
I am living the life I used to dream of and never thought I'd have. In my old life I was always hurting, angry, broken...rarely was I truly happy. I felt like I did not belong anywhere. I dreamed of a life where I'd be happy, where I'd have a home that felt like home, where I'd feel like I belonged. Here I am, honestly content with my life. Sure there are still dream for the future, but if my life stayed as it is today I'd be perfectly happy with that. I love my home, and it FEELS like home, I love the area I live in, I feel loved every day by the people around me. It truly doesn't get much better than this. As for my future dreams...
I plan on getting my degree and moving forward on the career path I am on, which is serving the elderly and disabled in my community.
I plan to spend more time hiking, camping, just being outdoors.
One day maybe I will have the farm I dream of where I can raise more of my own food.
I also plan on continuing to feel loved every day by the people around me and loving them in return, because in the end that is what truly matters to me.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Sunday ramblings
Not a lot going on today...we'll be watching the Superbowl this afternoon, and eating yummy nacho's. Been kind of a lazy day.
Marc has been experimenting with dehydrated foods for hiking/camping. Last night we ate his first soup from all dehydrated veggies and meats...OMG it was so good! The only thing missing was a campfire and stars in the sky. Totally made me want to go camping. Of course it didn't help that earlier in the day we had driven up to Wynoochee Lake, walked around the campground and hiked a couple trails. Really gave me the camping itch.
I am ever so patiently (ok maybe not so patiently) waiting for my first real online classes to start. I just finished week one of orientation...and it's just making me want more! The orientation is kinda slow, and super easy. I am already finished my assignments for week two lol Anyhow I am totally looking forward to my first two classes and hope they won;t be too much for me!
Ok...guess that's it for this Sunday afternoon.
Marc has been experimenting with dehydrated foods for hiking/camping. Last night we ate his first soup from all dehydrated veggies and meats...OMG it was so good! The only thing missing was a campfire and stars in the sky. Totally made me want to go camping. Of course it didn't help that earlier in the day we had driven up to Wynoochee Lake, walked around the campground and hiked a couple trails. Really gave me the camping itch.
I am ever so patiently (ok maybe not so patiently) waiting for my first real online classes to start. I just finished week one of orientation...and it's just making me want more! The orientation is kinda slow, and super easy. I am already finished my assignments for week two lol Anyhow I am totally looking forward to my first two classes and hope they won;t be too much for me!
Ok...guess that's it for this Sunday afternoon.
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Letting go...
Have you ever held on to something or someone just because you were afraid of letting go? I am sure you have...I think we all have. I know I have, on more than one occasion. Usually I hold on to relationships(friends, loves, family ect...) after they are long over. I think I hold on to the dream that maybe it can be what it once was. I am learning that some people are meant to come into your life and they are also meant to leave it. I have found that hanging on too long only ends up making letting go hurt even more. Letting go can be both painful and freeing. The hard part is deciding whats worth holding on to and whats not. A few years ago I was ready to let go of my marriage and today I am so glad I didn't. Slowly I am learning what I need to let go of...
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
The little things
Its always the little things that bring me the most comfort and happiness...
The beauty of the sunrise
The sound of children laughing
The birds flying outside my window
But one of the things that brings me the most happiness is hearing the way my boys interact together. Those boys get along so well and I am so thankful for that. I always wondered as they were growing up if they would be close as adults. Well now they are getting closer to adulthood (one has reached it in age, not sure about maturity lol) and they are so close. Last night around 9pm they decided they were going jogging. I was laying in bed listening to them get ready and it just made me smile, made me feel so happy inside as I listened to their banter, their laughter. I believe that as adults they will remain very good friends, and that makes my heart happy.
The beauty of the sunrise
The sound of children laughing
The birds flying outside my window
But one of the things that brings me the most happiness is hearing the way my boys interact together. Those boys get along so well and I am so thankful for that. I always wondered as they were growing up if they would be close as adults. Well now they are getting closer to adulthood (one has reached it in age, not sure about maturity lol) and they are so close. Last night around 9pm they decided they were going jogging. I was laying in bed listening to them get ready and it just made me smile, made me feel so happy inside as I listened to their banter, their laughter. I believe that as adults they will remain very good friends, and that makes my heart happy.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Its official
I am enrolled in school! At the age of almost 38 (wow, I sure don't feel that age) I am going back to school. I have enrolled with the University of Phoenix as a full time student. I am working towards my AA in Human Services and when I am done with that I plan on moving on to my BA in the same field. All of my classes are online, which freaks me out a little but I am hoping I will manage ok. So my 3 week orientation starts on Monday and my first day of class will be Feb 28th. Wish me luck! This is a very busy time of year for me anyhow, so hoping I can keep it all balanced.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Conversations with Blake
I swear I could dedicate this entire blog to conversations with my youngest child...
Blake "Mom, can I get a tattoo when I am older?"
Me " Well sure, you can do what you want when you're eighteen"
Blake "Good because me and Keegan want to get a tattoo that has something to do with Josh"
Me " I think that would be nice"
Blake " Ya something to do with baseball"
Me " Ya that would be good"
Blake " I know, we will get a bag of hot fries, a Slurpee and a baseball tattooed on us!"
Me " lol"
Blake " No really and on the hot fries instead of Andy's hot fries we'll get Josh Johnson Hot fries!"
Me " Well good thing you cant get one until your eighteen, maybe by then you wont think hot fries and Slurpee's will make a cool tattoo!"
Blake " I will still think its cool"
lol Oh my child.
Blake "Mom, can I get a tattoo when I am older?"
Me " Well sure, you can do what you want when you're eighteen"
Blake "Good because me and Keegan want to get a tattoo that has something to do with Josh"
Me " I think that would be nice"
Blake " Ya something to do with baseball"
Me " Ya that would be good"
Blake " I know, we will get a bag of hot fries, a Slurpee and a baseball tattooed on us!"
Me " lol"
Blake " No really and on the hot fries instead of Andy's hot fries we'll get Josh Johnson Hot fries!"
Me " Well good thing you cant get one until your eighteen, maybe by then you wont think hot fries and Slurpee's will make a cool tattoo!"
Blake " I will still think its cool"
lol Oh my child.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Anger
I find anger to be one of the most time wasting emotions there is. I used to be angry a lot, now I am rarely angry. Often now if I feel anger coming on I am able to talk myself out of it. I used to have this self talk in my head that would build my anger to the bursting point! Slowly over the years I learned to talk in a more positive way to myself. I literally have conversations in my mind lol I ask myself what good will getting angry in this situation do? And the answer is almost always nothing. It will do no good at all. The only think that will happen is I will feel like crap, the person I am angry with will feel like crap and nothing gets solved. Usually by the time I am angry, whataver it is that got me there is done. Anger can't undo it, but it can certainly make things worse. So most of the time now I handle things very calmly and rationally. My husband and kids are so used to my calm nature that if I ever do get angry you'd think the world ended! Can't really blame them though. Anyhow you should all try some positive self talk when you find yourself feeling angry about something. =)
The official for Pink's Fuckin Perfect(its good)
http://www.vevo.com/watch/pink/fkin-perfect/USLV41000041
The official for Pink's Fuckin Perfect(its good)
http://www.vevo.com/watch/pink/fkin-perfect/USLV41000041
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Death
Yes...it's a depressing topic, I know. Most days I am doing pretty good, but some days the sadness of it all just overwhelms me. When my son shows me his newest Ipod song (Toby Keith's Crying for me) My heart just aches for what he's lost, for what he saw, for what he will never forget. It's really hard to be a mother and not be able to ease your childs hurt, or take it away like you could when they were babies and the only hurt they had was a scraped knee. I can never erase his memories of the day his best friend was killed, all I can do is notice the little signs and let him know I am here. I am so thankful everyday for all that I have.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
40hrs a week
Whew! My hours at work were cut from 40 a week to 27.5 starting Jan 1. Thing is my work load didn't follow suit...in fact its grown! So now I am exhausted trying to get all that needs done in the hours I am working.
Yawn...time for a nap yet? I want my hours back!!!
Yawn...time for a nap yet? I want my hours back!!!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Dinner conversations
Well, let me start by saying we are a pretty open family lol You now how they say people really should eat together? Well...really, you should! You might learn something...tonight I learned a few interesting facts.
My boys think its totally wrong for an older guy to be with a younger girl, but reverse that situation and its "SO COOL!" Throw in a teenager doing his best friends mom and "OMG that is SOOOO COOL!AWESOME!" Me...not so cool boys! Don't be getting any ideas.
About a month ago my oldest child was threatened by a "skinhead" Told he was going to get his throat slit. Did my child shut up and walk away? No, no...he didn't. In fact he kept mouthing off back to the other guy. His ex girlfriend kept screaming at him to just stop. Andy's reply "Kaila! You are not my mom!" Finally a friend drug his ass into his car and drove off. Geez.
We discussed Andy's very embarrassing and drunken one night stand with a not so nice girl in town....he will never live that one down.
Oh, how about a great memory of their father. They were getting gas one time and a drunken east Indian man walked up and started asking for money. Their dad started yelling racial slurs at him. Ya...nice father figure. This was many years ago.
Oh...there is more, so much more lol But that's all for now folks ;)
My boys think its totally wrong for an older guy to be with a younger girl, but reverse that situation and its "SO COOL!" Throw in a teenager doing his best friends mom and "OMG that is SOOOO COOL!AWESOME!" Me...not so cool boys! Don't be getting any ideas.
About a month ago my oldest child was threatened by a "skinhead" Told he was going to get his throat slit. Did my child shut up and walk away? No, no...he didn't. In fact he kept mouthing off back to the other guy. His ex girlfriend kept screaming at him to just stop. Andy's reply "Kaila! You are not my mom!" Finally a friend drug his ass into his car and drove off. Geez.
We discussed Andy's very embarrassing and drunken one night stand with a not so nice girl in town....he will never live that one down.
Oh, how about a great memory of their father. They were getting gas one time and a drunken east Indian man walked up and started asking for money. Their dad started yelling racial slurs at him. Ya...nice father figure. This was many years ago.
Oh...there is more, so much more lol But that's all for now folks ;)
Monday, January 17, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Parenting Teenagers
I have to admit, parenting my teenagers has been easier than I ever imagined. One of the hardest things is how other people parent their teenagers! I don't consider myself old fashioned but there are some things that are just not ok in my books.
1. I will never think it's ok to offer a young teenager alcohol.
2. Young teenage boyfriends and girlfriends don;t get to stay the night together unsupervised.
Pretty simple to me, but over the years I have seen so many other parents just allowing this stuff. I know my teenagers might drink and they might have sex, but I am not going to be the one handing over the booze and a place to screw. If they want to do it they are gonna have to figure out how to do it on their own, and since I am constantly checking on them you can bet it's not going to be easy lol
Last night Blake called me and asked to stay at a friends. I said well as long as I can talk to his mom. "Why Mom!" lol the usual response. Because son, I want to know you are going to be where you say, doing what you say. Its a family I know and Blake is a good kid, so I am not too worried but still I want to talk to his mom. So a little while later, Blake texts me "Mom, Jamie is going to stay there too but we will sleep in different rooms. You can talk to Kelly. Ok mom??" Uhhh NO! lol Jamie is Blake's 15year old girlfriend. So no, the answer is no. A few minutes later he calls and says "Ok, Jamie isn't staying, can I stay? You can talk to Kelly" *sigh* Fine...so talk to Kelly (mom of the boy Blake wants to spend the night with) She assures me that they are staying at her place and that Jamie will not be there. So I let him stay. I talk to my kids ALL the time. They have a lot of freedom, because as of yet they aren't out doing things they shouldn't be doing. They know the minute I find out they are doing something they shouldn't be that freedom is gone. I also explain that I think they are way too young for alcohol and sex, and why. They know I drank young, and obviously I had sex young because I have a 21 year old son to prove it lol Anyhow, I can only do what I can do and hope I have given them the tools to say no. If they don;t say no I hope they will be smart about whatever they are doing.
But my thoughts on this whole situation last night were; Was this really OK by the 15 year old girls mom? and the mom of the other boy thought it was ok too? Ok so the kids are going to sleep in separate rooms...umm, I happen to know teenagers stay up all night and parents don't. Do you think those kids are gonna stay in separate rooms after you go to sleep? lol Not likely. Maybe I am old fashioned...
Anyone who knows Blake, knows he is a sweet and pretty innocent young man; I want to keep him that way as long as I can thanks.
*********************************************************************************
Must update after talking to Blake yesterday lol what really happened
Jamie asked Blake what his plans were for the night. Blake said he was going to stay at Jakes. Jamie said Oh I am going to stay at Jakes too!!! Blake told her that wouldn't be ok with his mom, she said well you won't know if you don't ask lol Blake said Uhh, yes I do lol But she convinced him to ask anyhow. Of course I said no, so I don't even know if the other parents ever knew of this little scheme.
1. I will never think it's ok to offer a young teenager alcohol.
2. Young teenage boyfriends and girlfriends don;t get to stay the night together unsupervised.
Pretty simple to me, but over the years I have seen so many other parents just allowing this stuff. I know my teenagers might drink and they might have sex, but I am not going to be the one handing over the booze and a place to screw. If they want to do it they are gonna have to figure out how to do it on their own, and since I am constantly checking on them you can bet it's not going to be easy lol
Last night Blake called me and asked to stay at a friends. I said well as long as I can talk to his mom. "Why Mom!" lol the usual response. Because son, I want to know you are going to be where you say, doing what you say. Its a family I know and Blake is a good kid, so I am not too worried but still I want to talk to his mom. So a little while later, Blake texts me "Mom, Jamie is going to stay there too but we will sleep in different rooms. You can talk to Kelly. Ok mom??" Uhhh NO! lol Jamie is Blake's 15year old girlfriend. So no, the answer is no. A few minutes later he calls and says "Ok, Jamie isn't staying, can I stay? You can talk to Kelly" *sigh* Fine...so talk to Kelly (mom of the boy Blake wants to spend the night with) She assures me that they are staying at her place and that Jamie will not be there. So I let him stay. I talk to my kids ALL the time. They have a lot of freedom, because as of yet they aren't out doing things they shouldn't be doing. They know the minute I find out they are doing something they shouldn't be that freedom is gone. I also explain that I think they are way too young for alcohol and sex, and why. They know I drank young, and obviously I had sex young because I have a 21 year old son to prove it lol Anyhow, I can only do what I can do and hope I have given them the tools to say no. If they don;t say no I hope they will be smart about whatever they are doing.
But my thoughts on this whole situation last night were; Was this really OK by the 15 year old girls mom? and the mom of the other boy thought it was ok too? Ok so the kids are going to sleep in separate rooms...umm, I happen to know teenagers stay up all night and parents don't. Do you think those kids are gonna stay in separate rooms after you go to sleep? lol Not likely. Maybe I am old fashioned...
Anyone who knows Blake, knows he is a sweet and pretty innocent young man; I want to keep him that way as long as I can thanks.
*********************************************************************************
Must update after talking to Blake yesterday lol what really happened
Jamie asked Blake what his plans were for the night. Blake said he was going to stay at Jakes. Jamie said Oh I am going to stay at Jakes too!!! Blake told her that wouldn't be ok with his mom, she said well you won't know if you don't ask lol Blake said Uhh, yes I do lol But she convinced him to ask anyhow. Of course I said no, so I don't even know if the other parents ever knew of this little scheme.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Friday, January 14, 2011
Just because it's Friday and I have nothing else I need to do
110. My last name: You know!
109. I was born in: Clearwater
108. I am really: glad I have the day off
107. My phone is: awesome!
106. My eye color is: blue/green
105. My ring size is: I dunno
104. My height is: short
103. I am allergic to: dust, animal dander, pollen...who knows what else
102. I was born on: the first day of spring
101. I am annoyed by: some people
100: What happened to question 189? huh?
99. My bed is: kingsized and cozy
98: One thing you don’t like about yourself: hmm...my shyness
97. Do you sleep on your BACK, STOMACH, SIDE? : side
96. How do you vent anger?: depends on what I am angry about
95. How did your day start off? letting my dog out at 4:30am
94. Do you get along with guys or girls better? I get along with almost anyone
93. How do you think you look right this moment? lol uhh...probably like crap, wearing an apron, hair in a pony tail lol
92. Last person you went to the movies with? Umm...maybe Angie? Its been sooo long I don't recall
91. My favorite Holiday is: Halloween
90. The last CD I bought was: I think Eminem
89. Do you have any siblings? 2 brothers, 2 sisters
88. What did you do yesterday? Worked
87. When in doubt?: trust your instincts
:::I Do /Do Not Believe In::::
86. Love at first sight? I believe
85. Luck? Kinda
84. Fate? Sorta
83. Aliens?: sure
82. Heaven?: don't know
81. Hell?: see above
80. Ghosts? I do
79. Horoscopes?: Somewhat
78. Soulmates?: hmm...I THINK i DO oops...caps lock lol
77. Karma? Yes
:::Which is Better?:::
AND YES YOU HAVE TO PICK ONE
76. Drunk or High? Nope, not picking one because neither work for me.
75. On the phone or online : online or text messaging!
74. Red heads or blondes? don't care
73. Blondes or Brunettes? don't care
72. Hot or cold?: cold
71. Summer or Winter: Both
70. Chocolate or vanilla? vanilla
69. Night or Day?: both
68. Oranges or Apples?: both
67. Curly or Straight hair: wavy
::Here’s What I Think About:::
66. Abortion: not for me
65. Backstabbers: dumb
64. Parents: do their best
:::Last time I:::
63. hugged someone: this morning
62. Saw someone: a few hours ago
61: Cried in front of someone: last night
:::Random:::
60. Who is the ditziest person you know: have no idea
59. Who makes you laugh: my kids
58. Last show you watched: I shouldn't be alive
57. What you don’t understand is: a whole lot of stuff
56. The most unsatisfying answer? i dont know
55. Something I really miss when I leave home is: my home
54. The thing I’m looking forward to the most is: the rest of my life
53. Tomorrow: Going to mark the start of a new path in my life :)
52. Today: is good
51. Next Summer: Camping, gardening, Powell River
50. This Weekend: will be 4 days!
49. The person(s) who knows the most about me is: hmm...tough question, I keep a lot of things to myself.
48. The most difficult thing to do is: say goodbye
47. I haven’t gotten a speeding ticket: false
46. The first person I talked to today was: Marc
45. First time you had a crush: Umm...I was like 9 or 10 I think
44. The one person who I can’t hide things from: No one
43. Last time someone said something you were thinking: happens a lot
42. Right now I am talking to: no one
41. What is your dream job?: To have my own organic farm
40. First job: baby sitting.
39. I have had these pets: everything...grew up on a farm.
38. I can still see: My dad's face
37. The worst sound in the world is: death
36. The person who makes me cry the most: No person in my life really makes me cry anymore
35. Best sound in the world?: my kids laughing
34. Who makes you happy? lots of people
33. Cats or dogs?: both
32. Myspace or Facebook: facebook
31. Mexican food or Chinese? depends on my mood
30. My favorite piece of clothing? pajamas
29. My favorite color(s) are: purple
28. Last time I cried: last night
27. My friends: ♥
26. My computer is: new
25. Last person I got mad at: co worker
24. Person you secretly crush on?: its a secret! geez ;)
23. Favorite place to eat : my house
22. Favorite song: There is no way I can pick one
21. The all-time best show is: No clue
20. The all-time best feeling in the world is: love
19. Favorite scent: lots of stuff
18. What color is your hairbrush: purple and black
17. Favorite shoes: slippers
16. I lose all respect for people who: have no morals
15. favorite channel to watch: food network or hgtv
14. favorite food: seafood
13. favorite day of the week: hmmm...usually Friday
12. Best Feature(s) in the opposite sex: Their heart
11. The worst pain I was ever in was: when I watched my dad take his last breath
10. Best Memory: too many to type, I am blessed with truly amazing memories
9. Favorite TV show? Law and Order SVU
8. My favorite singer/band: Lots
7. Favorite Stuffed Animal? lol well I have quite the collection...can't pick just one!
6. Greatest Fear: Losing people I love
5. My weakness is: my emotions
4. When was your last concert? a few months ago I saw Patty Loveless here in my town.
3. Who broke your heart? Well my heart has been broken a few times...
2. One thing that makes you feel great is: my amazing children
1. One person that you wish you could see right now? : My dad
109. I was born in: Clearwater
108. I am really: glad I have the day off
107. My phone is: awesome!
106. My eye color is: blue/green
105. My ring size is: I dunno
104. My height is: short
103. I am allergic to: dust, animal dander, pollen...who knows what else
102. I was born on: the first day of spring
101. I am annoyed by: some people
100: What happened to question 189? huh?
99. My bed is: kingsized and cozy
98: One thing you don’t like about yourself: hmm...my shyness
97. Do you sleep on your BACK, STOMACH, SIDE? : side
96. How do you vent anger?: depends on what I am angry about
95. How did your day start off? letting my dog out at 4:30am
94. Do you get along with guys or girls better? I get along with almost anyone
93. How do you think you look right this moment? lol uhh...probably like crap, wearing an apron, hair in a pony tail lol
92. Last person you went to the movies with? Umm...maybe Angie? Its been sooo long I don't recall
91. My favorite Holiday is: Halloween
90. The last CD I bought was: I think Eminem
89. Do you have any siblings? 2 brothers, 2 sisters
88. What did you do yesterday? Worked
87. When in doubt?: trust your instincts
:::I Do /Do Not Believe In::::
86. Love at first sight? I believe
85. Luck? Kinda
84. Fate? Sorta
83. Aliens?: sure
82. Heaven?: don't know
81. Hell?: see above
80. Ghosts? I do
79. Horoscopes?: Somewhat
78. Soulmates?: hmm...I THINK i DO oops...caps lock lol
77. Karma? Yes
:::Which is Better?:::
AND YES YOU HAVE TO PICK ONE
76. Drunk or High? Nope, not picking one because neither work for me.
75. On the phone or online : online or text messaging!
74. Red heads or blondes? don't care
73. Blondes or Brunettes? don't care
72. Hot or cold?: cold
71. Summer or Winter: Both
70. Chocolate or vanilla? vanilla
69. Night or Day?: both
68. Oranges or Apples?: both
67. Curly or Straight hair: wavy
::Here’s What I Think About:::
66. Abortion: not for me
65. Backstabbers: dumb
64. Parents: do their best
:::Last time I:::
63. hugged someone: this morning
62. Saw someone: a few hours ago
61: Cried in front of someone: last night
:::Random:::
60. Who is the ditziest person you know: have no idea
59. Who makes you laugh: my kids
58. Last show you watched: I shouldn't be alive
57. What you don’t understand is: a whole lot of stuff
56. The most unsatisfying answer? i dont know
55. Something I really miss when I leave home is: my home
54. The thing I’m looking forward to the most is: the rest of my life
53. Tomorrow: Going to mark the start of a new path in my life :)
52. Today: is good
51. Next Summer: Camping, gardening, Powell River
50. This Weekend: will be 4 days!
49. The person(s) who knows the most about me is: hmm...tough question, I keep a lot of things to myself.
48. The most difficult thing to do is: say goodbye
47. I haven’t gotten a speeding ticket: false
46. The first person I talked to today was: Marc
45. First time you had a crush: Umm...I was like 9 or 10 I think
44. The one person who I can’t hide things from: No one
43. Last time someone said something you were thinking: happens a lot
42. Right now I am talking to: no one
41. What is your dream job?: To have my own organic farm
40. First job: baby sitting.
39. I have had these pets: everything...grew up on a farm.
38. I can still see: My dad's face
37. The worst sound in the world is: death
36. The person who makes me cry the most: No person in my life really makes me cry anymore
35. Best sound in the world?: my kids laughing
34. Who makes you happy? lots of people
33. Cats or dogs?: both
32. Myspace or Facebook: facebook
31. Mexican food or Chinese? depends on my mood
30. My favorite piece of clothing? pajamas
29. My favorite color(s) are: purple
28. Last time I cried: last night
27. My friends: ♥
26. My computer is: new
25. Last person I got mad at: co worker
24. Person you secretly crush on?: its a secret! geez ;)
23. Favorite place to eat : my house
22. Favorite song: There is no way I can pick one
21. The all-time best show is: No clue
20. The all-time best feeling in the world is: love
19. Favorite scent: lots of stuff
18. What color is your hairbrush: purple and black
17. Favorite shoes: slippers
16. I lose all respect for people who: have no morals
15. favorite channel to watch: food network or hgtv
14. favorite food: seafood
13. favorite day of the week: hmmm...usually Friday
12. Best Feature(s) in the opposite sex: Their heart
11. The worst pain I was ever in was: when I watched my dad take his last breath
10. Best Memory: too many to type, I am blessed with truly amazing memories
9. Favorite TV show? Law and Order SVU
8. My favorite singer/band: Lots
7. Favorite Stuffed Animal? lol well I have quite the collection...can't pick just one!
6. Greatest Fear: Losing people I love
5. My weakness is: my emotions
4. When was your last concert? a few months ago I saw Patty Loveless here in my town.
3. Who broke your heart? Well my heart has been broken a few times...
2. One thing that makes you feel great is: my amazing children
1. One person that you wish you could see right now? : My dad
My toe always bleeds when I play soccer...
WTF? lol ya...my thoughts exactly.
The boys had soccer practice last night. They get home and Kyle comes in and shows me the blood on his socks. I said "what happened?" He says "Nothing, my toe always bleeds when I play soccer." off he goes to change lol He comes back in and I say "Let me look at that toe!" he says "Why mom, its nothing bad" Kalene (his gf) says "Well thats not normal!" I say "Exactly! Now let me see it." Off comes his sock and I can see the blood on his toe, make him put his foot on my lap. Huh...what do I see? Toenails so long they are cutting into his other toes when he wears his soccer cleats!!!!! Umm...hello, CUT YOUR TOENAILS lol OMG...what a boy.
The boys had soccer practice last night. They get home and Kyle comes in and shows me the blood on his socks. I said "what happened?" He says "Nothing, my toe always bleeds when I play soccer." off he goes to change lol He comes back in and I say "Let me look at that toe!" he says "Why mom, its nothing bad" Kalene (his gf) says "Well thats not normal!" I say "Exactly! Now let me see it." Off comes his sock and I can see the blood on his toe, make him put his foot on my lap. Huh...what do I see? Toenails so long they are cutting into his other toes when he wears his soccer cleats!!!!! Umm...hello, CUT YOUR TOENAILS lol OMG...what a boy.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Tula
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
My journey, your journey...
So I had a conversation with my mom this morning that made me think about this journey I call life and how it compares to others. In fact it inspired me to start a blog...for the millionth time lol
We are all on a journey and we all follow a slightly (or extremely!) different path. My path is no better than yours; nor is my path the right path for you to be on. Just as your path is not right for me. Our paths may cross from time to time, or they may even parallel each other, or maybe they will never cross at all. Just because our paths differ doesn't mean we cant be supportive of someone else's path. I know that sometimes we find ourselves on a path that feels so right and so wonderful we want to share it with everyone we meet! This path must be something everyone should follow because imagine how great the world would be if we all felt this great about our life journey! But wait...wouldn't life become awful boring if all walked the same path? How would we learn new things? How would we grow? I don't want to be on the same path as everyone else, but I sure do want to share some of the things I learn along the way.
So how do we share the wonderful things we find and still be mindful of others feelings? We have to try to remember that many people just are not receptive to new ideas, to new way's of thinking.Maybe they are just happy the way they are and don't see any reason to change. Or maybe they know they need to change but just don't know how. Or maybe they are on their own path to change and just want to go at their own pace. Wherever they are, you can share your success's, your ideas in a way that will hopefully open some eyes along the way.
Rather than tell people what you wish they would change about themselves, try telling them what you have changed about you. Explain what you've been doing on your current path, explain how it has changed you. Give them some information, and then let them do what they want with it. Many people will listen and take some of what you give them and apply it to their own lives. Show people by your own example; live your best life and show people what that does for you. Chances are some people will want to join you (if only just a little) on that path.
Remember the only person you can change is you.
Be true to you.
Live simply, Laugh often, Love deeply
We are all on a journey and we all follow a slightly (or extremely!) different path. My path is no better than yours; nor is my path the right path for you to be on. Just as your path is not right for me. Our paths may cross from time to time, or they may even parallel each other, or maybe they will never cross at all. Just because our paths differ doesn't mean we cant be supportive of someone else's path. I know that sometimes we find ourselves on a path that feels so right and so wonderful we want to share it with everyone we meet! This path must be something everyone should follow because imagine how great the world would be if we all felt this great about our life journey! But wait...wouldn't life become awful boring if all walked the same path? How would we learn new things? How would we grow? I don't want to be on the same path as everyone else, but I sure do want to share some of the things I learn along the way.
So how do we share the wonderful things we find and still be mindful of others feelings? We have to try to remember that many people just are not receptive to new ideas, to new way's of thinking.Maybe they are just happy the way they are and don't see any reason to change. Or maybe they know they need to change but just don't know how. Or maybe they are on their own path to change and just want to go at their own pace. Wherever they are, you can share your success's, your ideas in a way that will hopefully open some eyes along the way.
Rather than tell people what you wish they would change about themselves, try telling them what you have changed about you. Explain what you've been doing on your current path, explain how it has changed you. Give them some information, and then let them do what they want with it. Many people will listen and take some of what you give them and apply it to their own lives. Show people by your own example; live your best life and show people what that does for you. Chances are some people will want to join you (if only just a little) on that path.
Remember the only person you can change is you.
Be true to you.
Live simply, Laugh often, Love deeply
Blogging
I have made several attempts at blogging in the past and they always end up the same way...forgotten! This time may be no different at all, no promises. We will just have to see what happens! This blog will be about my life journey, which means it may be completely off the wall and random. Each day will bring whatever I feel like writing about...or maybe nothing at all. Like I said, we will just have to see what happens! So thanks for reading and enjoy the ride =)
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